Love the One You’re With — You

Happy Valentine’s Day!  This a day that society has set aside for love, and let’s face it, most women are happy on today.  While boyfriends and husbands

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ALWAYS CELEBRATE YOU BECAUSE YOU’RE WORTH IT

race around shopping for the perfect gift or something that expresses how they feel about them, their woman waits in anticipation.  Some women are expecting this will be the day that their beau will propose to them, and they are already imagining the type of ring they will receive.   While other women only want a nice candle lit dinner, flowers, and perhaps a movie.  Still other women just want a nice quiet evening with their respective other.  These are the group of women who are blissfully happy.

However, there is another group of women who aren’t in a relationship and are depressed on this day as they hear about the love that’s being bestowed upon their female friends and family members.  While they’re outwardly excited for them, inwardly they are unhappy and wonder when will be their turn for love.  Some women even question what’s wrong with them because they feel unwanted and unloved.  

While Valentine’s Day is a great time to show love for those we care about, we should celebrate it every single day of the year.  Love on those that you care about by calling or texting or spending time or whatever your love language is.  Oftentimes, it’s the small things that mean the most, but are frequently missed.

For those of you who don’t have anyone on this day, love the one you’re with — you.  If you like flowers, it’s okay to buy your own; put them in a vase on your table to admire.  Watch that chic flick that you’ve been dying to see while laughing or crying or both.  If you like jewelry, who says you can’t purchase your own?  You can even get together with your single girlfriends and enjoy each other’s company.

Yes, it’s great to have someone shower you with love today.  However, learn to love the one you’re with…you.

I’m updating my post because after reading today’s blog, one of my male readers made a great point.  He said women aren’t the only one’s with feelings.  Guess what?  He’s correct.  We often forget that men feel the way we do because they are often made to squash or hide whatever sensitive emotion they’re experiencing.  However, I beg to differ.  Honestly, I don’t there is anything more appealing than a man who can share his true emotions.  Now, I know some of you women may disagree because that’s what we’ve been taught to believe. 

So to all of my male readers that may find yourselves alone today, don’t feel lonely.  Do something for you.  Go out and purchase that bottle of cologne you’ve been eyeing.  Grab a box of Chinese food or whatever you have a taste for.  Go home and check out that action packed flick that you’ve been too busy to watch.  Whatever you do, enjoy your day!

Always remember, #WeAllGotItGoinOn

Love ya,

Grace

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P.S.:  This is how I decorated my table for the month of February.

Milk and the Cow…

I’m writing today’s post at the request of one of my readers.  She wants to be married, and is currently living with her boyfriend.  However, when she broached

the subject of marriage, his response was:  There are things “you” need to work on and behaviors “you” need to correct before I can even “think” about marrying you.

I’m sure many a woman have faced this same dilemma.  You and your boyfriend live together and are “playing” house, so to speak (not judging).  Unfortunately, oftentimes, you two have varying outlooks on where the relationship is headed — you marriage but, unfortunately, sometimes, he just wants to keep you in girlfriend status.

So my reader is a little down because she doesn’t know what to do at this point.  She and her boyfriend have lived together for a little bit.  They share the bills, chores, cooking and, of course, intimacy.  However, he is not currently ready for marriage based on their conversation(s).  The reader feels like she is in girlfriend status, but doing wifely things, and this is not how she envisioned their relationship to be.  She doesn’t feel comfortable with intimacy and some of the things he is asking that she do, and is often told in so many words that “it really isn’t all that great”.  I can visualize all of you right now rolling your eyes.  Trust me, I know.

The reader doesn’t want to get “stuck” being a girlfriend indefinitely but wants to know what to do at this point.  It’s easy for everyone to say, “Girl, if he’s not going to marry you now, you need to leave him” because we’re all on the outside looking in.  Some people may even say, “You shouldn’t live with him anyway unless you’re married” as they look down their noses (people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones).  However, when your heart is involved, it’s not as easy as it seems; you aren’t able to think clearly, even though your head is trying to lead you in the right direction.

There is an old saying, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free”?  Sometimes, guys only want the milk, and not the cow.  They will “play” house as long as they are allowed to without any real commitment.  In most instances, we, as women, become emotionally attached a lot sooner than men do and, therein, lies the problem.  However, in my opinion, men know the type of woman they are looking for and who they want to spend the rest of their lives with, but cannot and will not be rushed just because we want it “now”.

If you’re in a relationship, talk about what you want and don’t want before the relationship goes too far.  If you want to be married, don’t be afraid to say that as you are getting to know him.  If you want children, that should also be a topic of discussion.  No one likes to be blindsided by these conversations later because they feel like you’re changing the rules midstream.  The flip side of the coin is that you’ve been with your man for several years, and every time you discuss marriage he chokes up.  You ask him why, and his response is “I’m just not ready”.  Then, “Houston, you’ve got a problem”.

Now, getting back to the reader’s question, what should she do?  We all make choices — some good, some not so good.  Personally, I’ve never lived with anyone before marriage, so I don’t know that I can answer that question appropriately; however, that doesn’t make me any better of a person than she is.  We’ve all done things and are still doing things that we’re not proud of because none of us are perfect.  What I can say is that we have to not only listen to what our partner says but pay attention.  There are definitely times that “he is just not that into us”.  If he says that he only wants to keep you in the friend zone, believe him.  You can never try to force a person to do something they don’t want to because it will blow up in your face every single time.  I will say, though, that sooner or later you’ll have to make a decision in terms of what’s best for you.  If you want marriage and he is saying no cigar, then you need to rethink your relationship.  You don’t want to spend a million years with someone who is not on the same page as you and possibly miss the “one”.

Years ago, I dated a guy whose sister-in-law told me that he would never get married.  Not long after that we stopped dating.  He has been dating a woman for years now, and hasn’t married her to this very day.  I’m not knocking it because apparently it works for them.  However, this arrangement doesn’t work well for every woman and you need to make sure you’re getting what you want.

Sometimes, you may find yourself alone because you refuse to settle for less than what you want or deserve, for that matter, and it’s perfectly okay.  Trust me, when I tell you, that settling will cause you a lot of heartbreak and heartache.  Been there.  Done that.  Didn’t feel good.

Don’t continue to be milked only if that’s not what you want because…

Always remember, #GurlYouGotItGoinOn

Love ya,

Grace

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If you have topics that you would like to see covered, please feel free to leave a comment or email me directly at grace.deveraux@yahoo.com.

Why Leave It Up To Someone Else?

Now, that I’ve got your attention, I’m talking about life’s most precious gems – our

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These gems can’t begin to compare to our “children” no matter how costly they are.

children and/or grandchildren (for those grandparents who are raising them).

 

People look to basketball players, baseball players, celebrities and the like to be role models.  However…it should start at home.  Don’t you think?  What type of life are you living in front of your children?  Are you teaching them about life’s lessons?  Are you watching what you say and do around them, particularly, when they are at the impressionable phase of their lives wherein they mimic everything that you say and do?  Are you monitoring what they’re watching on TV?  Are you careful about where you leave them and with whom?  Do you know their friends and their friends parents?  Are you just dropping them off anywhere, so that you can have free time to “unwind”?

Why entrust your “gem(s)” to someone else for them to look up to?  I understand that we point out certain well-known people to show them who and what they can be, and that’s fine, but you have to live the life of positivity around them daily because they’re with you most of the time.  Be the change that you want to see in them.  Who else should they pattern their lives after other than their caretakers?

When you look at your children/grandchildren, do you see yourself, positively, in them?  Do they have your outgoing personality?  Are they caring?  Are they sensitive?  Are they helpful?  Do they laugh a lot?  Are they adventurous?  What do you see?  One of my friends and I had a conversation about this recently and the consensus was that if you see nothing, perhaps, you’re not spending enough “quality” time with them.  Hmm?  Food for thought.  The flip side of the coin is that because we are with our children/grandchildren everyday, we may not notice just how much they are like us and the influence we have on them — positively or negatively.

There are exceptions, however, as it is with every rule.  Perhaps, you are a woman raising your son alone, and have no idea how to teach him to be a boy or prepare him for manhood.  There are programs available such as the Big Brother program, and some of your local churches even have mentor programs.  You’ll have to do some searching, but it’s worth it.  If you need assistance, don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask.  After all, your child’s very life depends on it.

For those of you who don’t need help, put in the work with your child.  I guarantee the results will be rewarding.  You never know who you’re raising your precious gem(s) to be.

As always remember, #GurlYouGotItGoinOn

Love ya,

Grace

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Let It Go!

This week, I had no idea what I was going to write about, and was actually stuck.  One of my friend’s read last week’s post on “Still No Bun in the Oven”, and wanted to give his perspective from a man’s point of view.  Then, on my ride into work one morning, I was talking to one of my friends about some “stuff”, and the word he gave me was “Let It Go”.  He said it several times until it finally sank in.  I thought to myself, “Hmm, I’m sure I’m not the only one who needs to let things go and, thus, my second post was born.   

I’m the type of person whose mind is constantly racing.  I can’t turn it off unless I’m sleeping.  While I’m driving, I’m thinking. While I’m working, I’m thinking.  Always thinking, thinking, thinking.  I’m sure this is one of the many reasons why I’m comatose after I fall asleep.  You could move my bed, and I probably wouldn’t notice until I woke up the next morning.

There are days that I just can’t seem to let things go.  Things bother me way more than I let on.  I need to let it go!  

Have you ever been angry at someone for something they’ve done to you.  It’s been years, and you’re still holding onto it.  It’s time to let it go!

You’re stressing over finances.  You’ve been stressing over your children.  You’ve been stressing over your job.  You are still stressing over the terrible relationship.  You’re stressing because your biological clock is ticking.  You’re stressing because you’re not in a relationship.  You’re stressing, stressing and stressing some more.  Let it all go.  

Start your weekend off on a good note —

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As always, remember #GurlYouGotItGoinOn

Love ya,

Grace

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Still No Bun in the Oven — “From A Man’s Perspective”

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One of my friends (who ask not to be identified) read last week’s post, “Still No Bun in the Oven”, and this is what he had to say about it:

“Please allow me to contribute to your posting on January 18, 2019.  Infertility in women is a very sensitive subject and for a very long time to present, women have been blamed or, sadly, blamed themselves for this unfortunate situation.  I am an African immigrant and I witnessed this growing up.  To this very day, women are being blamed for their infertility in most African tribes.  Women are divorced for their inability to have children or husbands are allowed to bring other women into the marriage all in the name of searching for fertility.  Women are reduced to last class or no class citizens for their inability to bear children.  To a larger extent, I would say, this is due to lack of education and ignorance in the Western civilization on one hand, and beliefs rooted in deep African cultures where the “gods” are blamed for everything on the other.

According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), pregnancy is the result of a process that has many steps.

Infertility may result from a problem with ovaries (ovulation), fallopian tube or uterus.

So it is the woman’s fault if she’s not pregnant! Yeah!  This is what the myth of the African “gods” and the Western ignorance stem from.

To all the women out there, you have been blamed for many things but infertility should not be one of them.  Most of us “men” do not understand your plight, disappointment and desperation.

I wish to share some facts with you.  According to the National Institute of Health (NIH), infertility is also prevalent among men.  Smoking, drinking too much alcohol and using “street” drugs can cause infertility among men.  Exposure to toxic substances and other harmful materials at work or at home, such as synthetic chemicals, metals, fertilizer, bug spray, and cat or rodent feces, can hurt the reproductive systems of men and women (NIH).  What kind of job does your man do?  Sometimes a man is born with problems that affect his sperm.  Other times, problems start later in life due to illness or injury.  A man’s sperm can be changed by his overall health and lifestyle (NIH).

In addition, STD’s can cause infertility in both men and women.  Age is another factor.  In most African cultures, men are marrying girls two or three times younger and yet it is the wife that is infertile.   Also, prescribed, unprescribed or herbal medication cannot be ruled out for our infertility.

All I’m saying guys is that we should give our women a break. I f we truly love them, don’t blame them.  Join them in finding out the problem of their infertility and how to address it.  It should be a family process and not intended to find out who’s fault if there is “no bun in the oven” borrowing Devereau’s phrase.  Also, remember that there is a divine reason why some women are infertile and neither Science nor the “gods” can explain.

Finally, I will leave this with your many readers:  Two years ago on Mother’s Day, I sent out a text to my many female friends on my social list.  The title was “Who is a Mother?”  I went on to write: “mother” means so much to so many people in so many different ways.  To define the word “mother” is far beyond the scope of our intelligence.  There are women who have had a child or children and are not mothers, and sadly, there are many women who have never had a child and are, mothers!  Great mothers!  I went on to state the qualities of a mother and how some women have forfeited it while others have earned it.  In a true sense of the word, Some Men are Mothers!  Too deep.  Isn’t it?”

I found it quite interesting to hear about infertility from a man’s point of view.  I hope this not only enlightens everyone, but also aid in being sensitive to those who have infertility issues, and also as a reminder that infertility affects both men and women.

As always, remember #GurlYouGotItGoinOn

Love ya,

Grace Image result for red heart

 

Still No Bun in the Oven…

All The, All, and Oven: We spent all the dough...  ...still no bun  in the oven.

INFERTILITY...is a word that women who are planning to have a family never, ever want to hear.  It’s considered a bad word.  It’s a word that more often than not makes women feel inferior to their counterparts  who are able to conceive.  Unfortunately, for one reason or another, some women will never be able to have “a bun in the oven”.

Infertility – the inability of a sexually active, non-contracepting couple to achieve pregnancy in one year (World Health Organization).

About 10 percent of women (6.1 million) in the United States between the ages of 15 to 44 have difficulty achieving pregnancy or staying pregnant (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, CDC).

When we are little girls, we play with our doll babies.  We dress and undress them a million times.  We change them into various outfits.  We comb their hair.  We carry them around with us everywhere we go.  There are even some dolls, who are so life-like that it’s down right scary, so it’s almost like caring for a real baby.  As we played house, we dreamt of being a mommy one day.  For some girls, that’s all they want out of life — to be a wife and a mother.  That’s it.  Nothing else.  However, things don’t always go as planned.

Fast forward  15 to 20 years or so.  You’re at the point wherein you’re ready to start a family.  You’re excited and maybe even have selected the month in which you plan to conceive  Nothing happens.  Susie comes the following month.  You figure, perhaps, the birth control method that you had been using is still in your system.  You try again, again, and again.  Still nothing.  Susie shows up every single month.  You’ve bought ovulation kits, and still nothing.  You get depressed.  You’re angry.  You’re hurt.  You start to wonder if there’s something wrong with you.  Why is it that everyone else around you seems to be able to get pregnant except you?  You talk to your mate, and he reassures you that everything will be just fine.  Finally, you make an appointment to see your doctor.  They schedule you for a procedure to make sure that your tubes are open (hysteroscopy [to visualize your cervix], and/or D&C).  The results of your procedure come back normal; everything appears to be in working order.  You try, try, try and still no bun in the oven.  You become so distraught and discouraged that you no longer want to participate in intimacy because of the consistent disappointment month after month.

After the allotted time period (over a year [under age 35], six months [over age 35]), you and your partner discuss in vitro fertilization (IVF [storing and transferring of embryos]) and decide to talk it over with your OB/GYN.  You are told that even though this works for some people, it’s not successful for everyone.  Also, you were cautioned that this could result in multiple births, i.e., twins, triplets, etc.  Keep in mind this is a process, so you must be patient if you go this route (i.e., injecting of hormones, timing of the process, egg retrieval at the right time, etc.).

You check with your insurance carrier to see if it’s covered, and you find out that the infertility drugs and monitoring are covered and but not the cost of IVF.  You and your partner decide to take money out of your savings account because you believe it’s worth the risk, even though you’re scared to death.  What if you are in the percentage wherein it doesn’t work?  You proceed anyway because what do you have to lose.  After the embryo transfer, your doctor will probably perform a pregnancy test in two weeks.  For more information on infertility check out the National Infertility Association at http://www.resolve.org.

At this point, you’ve done all that can be done, and still nothing.  Susie has come every single month like clockwork.  How is it that people who don’t even want to have children manage to get pregnant, and you’ve waited your entire life and still can’t?  You know you’d make a great mother.  IT’S JUST NOT FAIR!

Your inability to conceive is putting a strain on your relationship because this is all you think about 24/7.  Your partner doesn’t understand, and is becoming frustrated with you.  You don’t want to be touched.  You don’t want to be encouraged.  You don’t want to discuss your barrenness because no one understands.  Everyone else has children EXCEPT YOU — or so it seems.  You feel worthless — like you’re less than a woman.  You feel like everyone pities you when they talk about their children and realize that you don’t have any yet.  For those people who don’t know your situation, they might “insensitively” ask you “So when are you planning to start a family”?  You want to run and hide.  You feel the tears trying to come, but you hold them back.  You respond, “One day”, and leave it at that.

Eventually, someone asks you if you’ve ever thought about adoption.  You tell them you couldn’t raise anyone else’s child because it wouldn’t seem like  your own.  They urge you to do some research on the matter.

You’ve pondered the conversation over again and again in your mind, then you decide to look into adoption.  It’s overwhelming, but for the first time in forever, you are getting excited.  Perhaps, adoption wasn’t such a bad idea after all.  Maybe, motherhood was still a possibility for you.  You decide to look into the various agencies as well as your local Department of Social Services to see which route is best for you.  After arming yourself with adequate information and even attending a support group for women who can’t conceive, you approach your partner.  You’re really surprised that he didn’t need much convincing.  His response was that “He just wanted you to be happy.  No matter what”.

You guys go through the entire process to become adoptive parents, which seems to take forever.  Finally, you are approved.  Now, the day has come for you to actually meet your bundle of joy.  You can’t contain yourself.  You don’t remember the last time you were so happy.  From the very first moment you hold your baby, it’s love at first sight.  This is YOUR BABY!  At long last, you’re a mother.

The reality of it is that every woman who wants to conceive will not be able to for one reason for another.  Yes, it can be depressing; however, you’re not alone.  Some of you will adopt while others will eventually go on with life and feel like you just weren’t meant to be a mother.

If you feel adoption is for you, it’s really a great thing.  There are so many children who need parents because for one reason or another, their biological parents aren’t able to parent them.  It’s perfectly okay.  There is nothing to be ashamed of.

Keep in mind that genetics play a part in whatever child you become the mother of.  Some people think because they adopt infants that they won’t have any issues because they’ve had them virtually from the time they were born.  I hate to burst your bubble, but that’s not so.  You can raise them and love them to the best of your ability but, please keep in mind, they will have their biological parents genetics.  Having said that, don’t be discouraged.  Adoption is a wonderful thing.  You’ll be blessed and so will your child(ren).

Don’t make it a secret when you adopt.  When you child is old enough, introduce them to the word.  You have to keep in mind that people in your circle know, and don’t always think.  Sometimes, people talk with children present, and you don’t want your child to be surprised.  You want to be the first to introduce them to the word adoption, so that they understand it’s nothing to be ashamed of.  You want to emphasize just how special they are.  As your “little” darling grows, they may have some behavioral issues because they felt like their birth parents didn’t want them.  Don’t take offense.  This is normal.  Unless you’ve been adopted, you couldn’t possibly understand how they feel.  You can be the best parent, and give them everything their hearts desire, but some children will always feel that “void”.

Everyone has a different outlook on how the adoption process should go.  Some parents don’t mind if the birth parents are in their lives while their child is young but there are others who don’t want that involvement.  You have to figure out what’s best for you and your family.  There really is no right or wrong decision.

There may come a time when your child desires to search for their birth parents.  Again, this is normal.  If they ask you questions, don’t shut them out.  If they ask for your help, assist them.  It doesn’t mean you were less than a parent.  I’m sure they love you with every fiber of their being.  However, they are curious about where they came from.  It’s perfectly okay.  Take a deep breath, shed a few tears, if necessary, and assist them.  The fear of the unknown is quite scary for everyone who will be involved on this journey.

Just because there is no bun in the oven doesn’t mean you can’t be a mother.  Weigh your options, and be happy about whatever decision you choose.

Always remember, #GurlYouGotItGoinOn

Love ya,

GraceClip Art Hearts

 

 

Why?

First of all, I want to start off by saying Happy New Year to everyone.  We made it!  For some 2018 was their best year yet while for others, it was a year that they are happy to see go with the expectation that 2019 will be the greatest year ever.  The truth of the matter is that none of us knows what lies ahead.  Sometimes, I wished I did, so that I could brace myself; however, the knowing would probably kill me as I’d worry myself to death.

I had no clue as to what my first topic of the New Year would be until one of my friends asked me to write about grief because she lost her son, unexpectedly, over the holiday.  This is probably not what some people are expecting to read about because we’re so accustomed to hearing about people’s resolutions (perhaps, some of you have even made your own), and claim to being the best year ever, etc.   However, things don’t always go as planned.

When I found out about the passing of my friend’s son, I hesitated a few minutes before I called her.  What do you say to someone at such a time as this?  I couldn’t say I understood because I didn’t.  I was honest and told her that I didn’t know what to say.  I could comfort and encourage her as best as I could, but I know that prayer is what’s going to take her through.  I check on her daily just to be sure she’s okay, but how can she be?  Her son is gone — forever.  I think the most hurtful part of all was that she didn’t get a chance to say goodbye.  She wasn’t there with him.

I’m sure she has a million and one questions, but the biggest question is “why”?  I understand loss as I’ve lost my biological father, great grandparent, grandparents, uncles, one of my best friends, etc.  Some were expected and some were not.  For the family members who were sick, even though I had a chance to spend time with them before they passed, it certainly didn’t lessen the pain.  I knew that I would be saying goodbye to them forever.  For the unexpected deaths, it was extremely difficult to process, emotionally.

I can remember when I was approximately 11 1/2 years old my uncle died tragically.  He had gotten into a fight with someone because they wouldn’t return his TV.  My grandmother (his mother) begged him not to go out that night but him being a man, who didn’t want to be looked upon as a “chump”, didn’t heed her warning.  He confronted his “friend” who refused to return the TV and it was on from there.  My uncle, my favorite uncle was stabbed to death.  His death, I believe, impacted me more than any other family member, perhaps, it was because I was so young or, perhaps, it was because of the great love that we shared.  Who knows?  This was the man who taught me how to ride my bike, and taught me about some of life’s lessons.  He would ride my sister and I on his back and run up and down the stairs of my grandmother’s house.  Of course, he wasn’t supposed to do that, but it was a lot of fun (if she had known, we would have all been in big trouble.  LOL!).  He was the greatest uncle ever!  I kept asking why did it have to be him.  Why couldn’t it have been someone else in my family?  I had just seen my Uncle Larry about a week or so prior to his death and he told my sister and I that come summer he was going to teach us how to swim.  Well, until this very day, I still can’t swim.  This is also the uncle who was so proud of me that when he shared the stage with Chuck Berry over 50 years ago, he had my grandmother bring me up there with him just to “show me off”.  I was about two years old, from what I was told.  I cried so much that they had to take me off stage.  I guess I missed my shot at stardom.  LOL!

Some of you may have lost loved ones earlier in 2018, while others lost their loved ones right at the holidays, which everyone expects to be full of festivities and long-lasting memories, as you spend time with your family.  No one ever thinks they will planning funeral arrangements during the holidays.  Let’s be honest.  It hurts like the dickens, and you’re often left with the “Why’s”.  None of us have the answers to this question.  We can say it was their time.  We can respond “God loved them best, so He called them home”.  We can say they rushed it by doing foolish or inappropriate things.  No matter, whatever answer we give ourselves, it still hurts, nonetheless.  Their time here on earth has passed and, sadly, they are with us no more.

Some people’s grief stems from the fact that they didn’t treat the person correctly, and they cry nonstop because they no longer have a chance to make amends.  They attend the funeral services and want to either take the person out of the coffin or get in the coffin with them.  Others may have a difficult time with  grieving because they didn’t get a chance to say goodbye due to the fact that their loved one’s death was totally unexpected.  While still others grieve because they can no longer make happy memories with their loved ones.  No matter the reason for your grief, it’s real and you’re still reeling from the pain.

People tell you that it will get better with time.  It will; however, no one can tell you how long it will take to get over your hurt and loss, and don’t let them.  It took one of my friends three months after the passing of her mother for her to really break down.  She had “made” herself so busy that she didn’t have deal with it emotionally until several months later, when it hit her, unexpectedly.

With the passing of your loved one, reflect on the “positive” memories you shared.  Think about those funny moments, those happy moments, those loving moments.  Let your lips curl into a smile as those thoughts come to your mind.  Pull out your phone or photo album and look at pictures that you guys make have taken together.  Perhaps, you call their phone just to hear their voice on the recording.

They are no longer with you physically, but the memories of them will last a life time.

It’s okay to cry because that’s perfectly normal.  Don’t let anyone tell you that you need to get over it or that you need to be strong for other people.  Crying is not a sign of weakness.  It’s perfectly healthy to let it out.  The last thing in the world you want to do is bottle it all up inside.  Talk to people who will listen to you as you vent, cry, go down memory lane, etc. because you need a good support system.

If you know someone who has experienced recent loss, please stay in touch with them.  After everything is over and everyone has gone home, they have nothing but free time on their hands to think, which could lead to anxiousness and depression.  Don’t leave them by themselves because they really do need you now more than ever.

I know it’s difficult now, but…

Always remember #GurlYouGotItGoinOn

Much love,Royal heart emoticon with a crown

Grace

We are here for you!