Hey, gurl, I hope you’re having a great day…
Several days ago, while I was walking to my car, the thought for today’s blog popped into my head. Why, you might ask? I feel that sometimes we don’t get the support we should from our “sisters” or “sista friends” for a variety of reasons.
As we know, women have the propensity to be downright catty (this is something that some learned from childhood and weren’t ever able to let it go). I’ve been around women who weren’t always kind, and I couldn’t figure out why, particularly as I hadn’t done anything (as far as I was aware). I used to work with a woman who, on a daily basis, would look me up down; she didn’t even try to be discrete about it. Was I uncomfortable? You betcha, but I tried not to let it show. Perhaps, I could have broached the subject with her, but I chose to ignore her negative behavior. I’ve passed by women who have mugged me for no particular reason, and just recently, I looked up only to discover someone giving me the “stank” eye or more commonly known as the “evil” eye. I said to myself, “Wow, really? I thought we were cool.”
Why is it that some women are threatened or jealous of other women? I’m sure that’s an age old question that, unfortunately, I don’t have an answer to.
Having said this, I’ve met some really wonderful women who have their stuff together. They know who they are and aren’t intimated by any other women no matter what their status in life is. They understand that there is “enough room at the table for everyone.” Period!
We, as women, should be able to compliment other women on their beauty (inner and outer), their sense of style, makeup, cooking, thrifty ways, etc., without feeling like that takes away from who we are. I often joke that Halle Berry doesn’t have anything on me. I’m not crazy. Trust me, I know that if she and I were beside each other, she would be the one to stand out in the crowd and 99.9% of the attention would be on her (that’s perfectly fine) because she’s a very beautiful woman. However, what I mean is that I’m confident in who I am. I don’t need nor I desire to look like or be anyone else besides myself although there was a time in my life that I wanted to be anyone except me.
Don’t make your sister feel unwelcome because you’re insecure. It’s time to take a long hard look at yourself, and figure out who you are. Those things that you’d like to change, do so. You don’t need to ask anyone’s permission to be yourself. You are unique. Maybe you haven’t figured it out yet, but you’re wonderful. Maybe you’re envious of your peers because you’ve been comparing yourself to them and feel as though you don’t measure up. I want you to stop thinking that right now! No two people are alike; we may have similarities but we’re our own individuals. Once you’ve arrived at this point, you’ll be able to love and even embrace your many sisters who are just waiting to welcome you with open arms.
To the Sisterhood…
This is my sister circle: Top, biological sister; right, best friend for 46 years; bottom, dearest friend for nearly 13 years. What I love about each of these women is that they add something totally different to my life, and it’s always, always wrapped in love — no matter what!
When you walk, lift your head like the QUEEN you are,
Gurl, don’t you know that you’re a shining star.
We have spent too many years trying to figure out this thing called “life,”
We don’t have time for jealousy, envy, and strife.
When they look you up and down,
Instead of turning your smile into a frown,
Put your head in the air,
As you leave them to wonder and stare.
Each day I’m working on who I aspire to be,
So, gurl you might as well stop wasting your energy hating on me.
Learn to love yourself and the skin you’re in,
Then, perhaps, you’d see that we could all win.
Always remember, #GurlYouGotItGoinOn
P.S.: I now have a podcast which is featured on Spotify as well as Apple Podcasts which you may find under Grace Deveraux or Chat With Grace. Also, you may find me on Instagram @Gracedeveraux. Please stop by and check out what I’ve been up to lately.